threshold |ˈθre sh ˌ(h)ōld|
2 the magnitude or intensity that must be exceeded for a certain reaction, phenomenon, result, or condition to occur or be manifested : nothing happens until the signal passes the threshold | [as adj. ] a threshold level.

Any time we are “holding a position” on something, we can be sure that we’re resisting something else, and therefore at the same time we are also at a Threshold. This is usually unknown to those that are holding such said position at the time, simply because the focus, to the exclusion of all else, is on defending this position, sometimes at all costs. This is being emotionally attached to something or an outcome; usually both.

Whatever we are holding a position on is a Belief System. All of us have Belief Systems – they are the foundations upon which our Reality is built! Without them, Thought would not expand to Create further. I like to use the acronym BS (for humour’s sake) for Belief Systems, to remind me that some things we believe in really are BULL SHIT(!) and really deserve to be released the moment we come into Awareness of such!

What do we get out of holding a position on something? Security. Safety. Identity. Not having to go any further… cos the unknown is … scary. And of course, we couldn’t possibly be THAT great. No… not us. We couldn’t be any greater than the system, the government, the elite… so we simply MUST hold our position on all that they are doing TO US and not for a moment think that we could, in a moment, stand on the Threshold of a new Reality that leaves whatever we were holding a position on in a puff of dust. No, not us… we are mere mortals. Yeah right.

I’m not deluded, I do understand my mortality… the mortality of my flesh and bones that is. But even that is a Belief System… simply because I don’t have a need to be attached to that either. Perhaps there are already Beings that are immortal in their flesh… but when physical existence is just one fun thing to do in the entire realm of the Universe and Eternity, I’m not sure they’d wanna be stuck in the one body for Eternity. Oh there I go again… Thinkin… Expanding the possibilities of my Mind… it really is Child’s play you know… this Creating thing… Imagination really is more important than Knowledge, apparently.

HmmMmm wonder why they put kids in school… do ya think… it is cos they are too smart for their own good? Who’s good? OH! That’s right… the cartel that’s decided to enslave the human race as a labour force (not too difficult to comprehend, we are called “Human Resources” ya know…. Resources for WHO?? Last time I checked, this planet contains all the Resources that one in a flesh and blood suit could EVER need to live quite comfortably here!)

Where was I? Oh, holding a position… well that’d be a perfect example! There I was, just mindin’ my own business, exploring my thoughts on those that are using us humans for their own purposes. With my Awareness, I now Observe, by my feelings of “yum” or “yuck” whether I may be “holding a position” on something, which would mean that I am emotionally attached to it. There’s a pay-off for me being attached to it, and, from experience, this is always at the expense of my growth, my opportunity to expand, that the limiting belief actually serves to birth.

How do our seemingly negative, or yuck, experiences, feelings, emotions and beliefs “serve to birth” our Growth? They’re like a “wake up call” … literally designed to feel that way so we pay attention……..  and change it.

Bein' a human resource? Yuck. What do I really want instead? FOCUS ON THAT!!!

We can simply be Aware of our Feelings in Present Time, to change course, to get back on our Path, our Middle Way …. Rather than wait for the degree of our resistance to intensify in order to “birth” our Threshold.

We are missing a very important opportunity if we put all our attention on “why” we feel yuck. Our energy and thoughts could be better spent on simply asking ourselves … what is the Positive Opposite of this? What do I really want to be experiencing instead? And that is the crux which defines how we view the world – either holding our position, otherwise known as “stuckedness,” in which all therapists, doctors healers and the like profit from our woes (usually reflecting their own stuff, we are but a mirror) or we are standing on a threshold of “What next?”

As a Wise Owl often reminds me when I am “Holding a Position” on something…. “If ya say so….”

To which I have, in Present Time, realised that I am holding a position on “needing others to get it” in order to validate my worldview. And conversely, how I have held myself back or been disquieted about others’ opinions of my thoughts and ideas. Both of which I can simply Choose to release and go beyond the threshold into new Awareness and Possibility, using the Emotional Freedom Technique (http://creativegoalsetting.com/eft/) with the following set up phrases:

“Even tho I have been holding a position on “needing others to get it” in order to validate my worldview, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”

“Even tho I have held myself back or been disquieted about others’ opinions of my thoughts and ideas, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.

Now what would be the Positive Opposite to that? Ummm… being me, without the attachment to anyone else needing to understand or validate me. Now that isn’t that scary is it? Oh… it may mean a few less “friends” … lucky I am Aware that I have my Self and can never be lonely, and that all new friends and people I associate without this attachment will be a bonus! YUM!

♥ `*.¸.*.♥.✿*.¸.*.♥☼ ❥ ... ℒƠѵℯ  Shriya 

A Dragon's Tale;  BLOG: http://adragonstale.weebly.com/

I’ve been watching facebook posts by those exposing the truth (“Conspiracy Theorist” was the name given these people BY those who were doing the “conspiring” deeds in the first place, and this fact alone explains the title of this blog post, yet, I’ll continue on… ) and sensed a certain point whereby it felt, to me at least, there was a need to go “beyond” this apparent, and yet very real, truth.

I’m talking about the “darkness” currently being played out in the world – if you’re reading this blog you probably already know what I’m talking about so won’t list the obvious list.  I Observed that those that were speaking this truth were still telling the same old story… for a year, or two, or maybe more (Just as I am able to Observe myself when I am telling the same ole story ;)) Sure, new things came to light, yet really, its just more of the same. The recent Snowden hoo-ha is the perfect example.

A while ago, I’d also discovered that most of the “anti-darkness” strategies, such as occupy movements, whistleblowers, the world-wide emulation of the “anonymous” masked man (from the movie “V for Vendetta”), for example, are all “Controlled Opposition”. Meaning, those that were doing the darkness, were ALSO causing and stimulating the very opposition to what they were doing.

WTF?! Why?

Simply… to keep people in fear.

Let’s look at an example:

““Even if you’re not doing anything wrong, you’re being watched and recorded. …it’s getting to the point where you don’t have to have done anything wrong, you simply have to eventually fall under suspicion from somebody, even by a wrong call, and then they can use this system to go back in time and scrutinize every decision you’ve ever made, every friend you’ve ever discussed something with, and attack you on that basis, to sort of derive suspicion from an innocent life.” Snowden.

Pretty scary huh? Do you reckon it would put people a bit more on edge, a bit more afraid? Make them want to be good, law abiding citizens? Maybe most… and for some … it’ll make them angry. But don’t worry, that’s a bonus too. They’re quite clever this bunch,  albeit arrogant, in knowing they can “harvest” the emotion of the Awakening Truthers. And by doing so, they actually FUEL their motives with the ‘fight’  (which will of course, lead to war, and of course, make them more money.) They are energy harvesters… which means they only want one thing. Power. And they feed off people’s fear, and anger, and ALL lower-tone emotional states.

Most people are simply unaware of the purpose of their emotions, let alone how to work with them effectively. Hubbard had it pegged with his “Emotional Tone Scale,” (http://creativegoalsetting.com/emotional-tone-scale/) in demonstrating that in order to move UP the Tone Scale, from fear and apathy, we must, in many cases, move THROUGH such fiery emotional states (eg anger, blame, revenge, hatred). Yet, its best we don’t get stuck there. Yet that is what many “truthers” are. Stuck.

The controlled opposition is perfectly timed. The new-age movement has been dutifully stuck in apathy, meditating on “love and light” for a few decades now. Some of them have pierced through that veil, and are getting smarter, and are seeing what is REALLY going on, and they’re the angry ones. And rightfully so! Yet, we were talking about Progressing. And if they’re not, sadly… they are playing their perfectly scripted part too.  All this REACTION to what is going on in the world, isn’t purely Creative, with a capital “C.” Its not High Level, Creative Constructive Thinking that someone who Knows who they REALLY are, would Think. Sure, it CREATES, but what is it creating? More of. And you know, whilst we “need” it … it will still keep happening. Just like why a victim of an abuser “needs” the abuser to keep abusing until she develops enough Strength, Courage, and Self Worth to walk away and set herself free… and only then knowing who she REALLY is. It does not justify the abusive or negative behaviour, it just simply is. Until it needs to be no more.

Back to Snowden, as our example. I mean … Who really cares what he is saying? Who really gives a shit if its true or not? Now this is not a denial/avoidance stance… I do get that what is happening is very real. But I also like to hang out somewhere in between worlds sometimes, and remind myself that there's more to it than meets my eye.  And from this vantage-point, if I’m speaking from my Knowing that this is simply representing my FEAR, materialized, and that I can Choose/Be/Do otherwise …well… I take my Power back. Cos taking Personal Responsibility means, Knowing I’d given it away. Yup. But I have to now DO something with this Awareness. Something different that engages me in the old way I no longer want to participate in. Fight, flight or Freedom…. Now which is it gunna be?

What we really need, is a REVELATION, not a revolution. A revelation of the Truth of who we REALLY are; which is indeed Creative Beings with the ability to Create our own reality. When we discover this, we have broken through another veil, now have Awareness of the Truth AND our ability to Create our ENTIRE Reality. That is where the REAL Power is.

Until we discover that the “them out there” is really US, and HOW to “atone;” ie literally “at one”.. Make one… meaning… take Full Personal Responsibility for them “out there” … cos unless we do … we’ll just keep on getting the same old results, or more likely, it will keep getting worse until we FACE that darkness, and own it.. We can’t do that if we’re stuck on “us vs them” or blame, anger, revenge.

So what is the darkness, and the Controlled Opposition telling us? For what Purpose have we Created it?  The “them out there” doing all sorts of disastrous things to our planet and the people is no different to a Sacred Contract that we have with a person in our lives. They literally show up to fight, manipulate, bully, abuse, or love us until we remember who we REALLY are, and Decide, we don’t wanna play that game no more. Game over. Next!

So the PARADOX is, by their very actions of simply attempting to keep us in fear, enslaving us, we can, using our Awareness, realize that we are in fear! And thus set ourselves free!

The darkness, by whichever names you call them – the elite, the illuminati, the government, the club of Rome, the monetary system … AND their controlled opposition, are all literally SERVING us to become the Greater version of ourselves… the one that we’d forgotten. Let’s not let them think they have it won, shall we?! Remember; no mud, no lotus. Well that's how it is for now anyway, so I'll use it as an example, but that too, as a metaphor, is also a Belief System (BS ;)), which can be released at any ole time we decide its no longer workin' for us. How bout now? "Even tho I've needed the darkness (mud) to help me grow and strive to remember who I REALLY am, I deeply and completely love and accept myself." There, that's done! (Am sure the lotus doesn't have any disparaging thoughts about the mud from whence it shoots... ahhh... us humans... sure are unique!) 

Where was I? Oh, setting ourselves (me) Free ... I remember that some smart bloke said “You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.”

Chemtrails, and ALL other goings-on that have us huffing and puffing, are literally the “writing in the sky” … time to wake up! It certainly doesn’t mean we don’t tell the truth. We can keep on tellin the truth, maybe smokin another joint, but at some point, like Bucky says, we just gotta get on with it. And the answers, the Way, is NOT within the current system, that’s for sure.

Whomsoever is our greatest enemy, be it a person, an organization, is also the fuel for our greatest Transformation.

Jesus said, apparently, in regard to one’s enemies “Turn the other cheek.”  This does not mean that we turn and get punched on the other side of our face. That’d be trying denial and avoidance… OUCH. It means to literally turn away from what we don’t want, and face what we do. YET, with Awareness; by Observing what we don’t want, we can become clearer what we really DO want! No matter “why” we got here – we did. The question is WHAT do we want now? What do we REALLY want now? And HOW is the best way to go about this? Fighting the old? Or turning away, and facing, ie DOING, what we REALLY want to be doing?

Can you Imagine if all that energy spent on marches, and exposing the truth, was spent, by millions… in not going to “paid employment” every day, and instead simply doing and being what one really loves and derives Joy from, be it mothering, writing, painting, gardening, developing water-fueled cars, thinking about new ideas, anything? In sharing with one’s neighbours anything they have an abundance of? In sharing the enough-stuff we ALREADY have on this planet? (Don’t’ buy into the scarcity meme… that too is a farce) In actually deploying the gazillions of alternatives to the environment damaging means we use for ‘energy’ that ALREADY exist?

Good news is, we don’t have to wait for everyone else to get it (that’s another blog post ;)). We have Author-ity of our own Reality. We can begin it. Now.

“How?” I hear you ask? Well, that is a very good question to begin with. Be sure to listen for your answer!

♥ `*.¸.*.♥.✿*.¸.*.♥☼ ❥ ... ℒƠѵℯ  Shriya 

A Dragon's Tale;  BLOG: http://adragonstale.weebly.com/

I picked a card: "Embrace the Darkness." 

Drawing this card after I’d just taken my first drink, I laughed to myself and thought “Fuck, yeah that’d be right!” I’ve spent a lot of time avoiding the darkness. Well, not exactly… I’ve been being POUNDED by it, so I had no choice to see, experience and feel it….. yet did not know a way out. I’d found my way to this ceremony because I really wanted through this. No… I really wanted OUT. I was tired and weary and could not ‘fight’ anymore. I was fighting for myself, for my very basic rights, and it wasn’t working. I knew I needed to surrender, but didn’t know how to in the face of so much fear. Although I’d begun, I kept getting triggered by the very things I wanted to escape from.  I knew that darkness had its place, but knowing and Knowing are two different things entirely. And I knew I needed to Know.

It took a while for the drink to settle in. I thought I could control it and was ruminating on my fear of throwing up. So what did I do – I threw up. I absolutely HATE throwing up (I know I know… who loves it?). When I finally surrendered to the fact I had to, I did so with the Awareness that I was in fact releasing all that did not serve me in that moment and I had made a conscious intention to do just that.

The first “purge” as its known didn’t reveal anything startling (other than looking at what was in the toilet and thinking I’m so glad to be getting rid of all that shit – other people’s shit as I perceived it) but as the effects of the plant took me deeper, I felt myself spiraling down into an awful state where I just didn’t want to be. I felt like I was going around in circles – yet  it really was a downward spiral; I was Aware, I was ever-present as the Observer, that I kept coming back to the same point again and again. The same pattern.

Things started to become more lucid, more psychedelic even. Ayahuasca contains only 2 percent DMT and we were quite severely warned by the One Serving that if our intention was to get high and hallucinate that we were in the wrong place. Ayahuasca is not a drug. To the Indigenous, it is obvious that westerners can only associate such experience as a drug, it is our only frame of reference. It is plant medicine, and its uses are varied and many. Only westerners think that it is to get high. Thankfully that was not the intention of this group, nor me. That I experienced such things was purely my way, my consciousness and Consciousness, of speaking to me in a manner I could understand.

When we set our intentions, I intended to release all that was not serving me from truly Walking my Path. And I intended to Create the Clarity and Courage to do so. Be careful what you wish for. You’ll get it – no matter what. As I was soon to discover, it was my game, I’d chosen it all along, and that there was soon to be a new understanding; a marked difference between choosing and Choosing.

(I use lower case and upper case versions of the same word/s to delineate the difference between what would be a “conscious,” (or “lower/ego-centric”), version of something that can also be experienced as a “higher” state… or from the perspective of our “Higher Self” as such, when we come into the Awareness of ourselves Observing).

I found myself in a game I didn’t want to play. I was experiencing a condensed, intense and amplified version in Present Time that mirrored my entire life until that point. I was in some matrix-like carnival, it was supposed to be fun but it made me sick in every possible way – physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.  It was experienced like a loud, boisterous television program, crazy carnival and silly advertising campaign all at once. I became Aware that I was experiencing all the layers of programming and conditioning and that this was the “matrix” that I’d been fooled into since arriving on this planet. I felt with extreme acuteness that it was the voices of parents, teachers, friends, the TV, books, radio, boyfriends, girlfriends… anything and everything …. everything but me. I had lived by everyone else’s decisions of who I was and what I should be and what I should do in my life… everyone and everything… other than me. With each trip to the toilet, I purged out my anger, hatred, rage, frustration and simply the very existence of this game. The new Awareness of having lived in it was so overwhelmingly nauseating. With each purge, I became even more Aware of this game, and that it was not my game, and that I desperately no longer wanted to play. I’d played it for a whole fucking lifetime up till now… just two days short of my 37 years on this planet. ENOUGH. I wanted OUT.

I just wanted to retreat, to lie down, to give up, to surrender – anything to make the pain of it go away.

But the pain would not go away.

I spiraled down even further and felt myself in utter hopelessness. I wandered. I was a crazy woman. I could barely stand, yet I kept wandering. I kept trying to get out, wondering who could help  me, who could I turn to. With each thought of going to get help, I would inadvertently keep fumbling, meandering about with both purpose to get somewhere to escape and aimlessness at the same time. I was lost. I was an utter, desperate, victim. Each time the Server was there offering me a hug, I found myself wanting to take it, yet merely the thought of doing so snapped me back into Awareness – what am I doing? No one is gonna fix it for ya. Get on with it then. All the while I was talking to myself, berating myself, yet there was a voice in there too that was tough and kept me going, it kept telling me the way… but in order to do so, I had to ask. There had to be a thought, a decision, of wanting out, and wanting something else.

Each further round to the toilet became more distressing. I became extremely pissed off that I was there again… yet each time… the Conversation with myself progressed. “Oh, here you are again.” I started “telling myself off” … as I was saying “I’ve had enough, I don’t wanna play anymore,” by saying “Well, why are you still playing then?” I was both little girl and the authority… like a demanding teacher. I was ‘beating myself up with a stick’ over it all. It became apparent, another revelation, that I was creating “lessons” for myself. Yep, that was the game… keep learning lessons… hey… isn’t that what you go to school for? Isn’t that what school, what our parents, what the new-age movement tells us to do? That we must learn our “lessons” and that all difficulties in life are to “teach us a lesson.” Well, I like LEARNING, but lessons… that seems to me just some sick game… something that sounds suspiciously religious. Every new Awareness was Progress, I even knew that whilst “under” the influence.

I kept telling myself off… well… its your game… you decided to play. You created it ALL. Yep, even though  it’s “other people’s stuff” … you still created it. This is taking Personal Responsibility. I had let it in. I went through self condemnation and self blame, until I discovered that there was no point to that either.

Each round back to the toilet, despite its attempts to dazzle me with carnival music, pastel fairy lights and little beings jumping off the toilet paper, brought this ugly game so into my face that I could not see a way out.

It was excruciatingly cold. I know cold = fear. I got myself back outside, by the fire, yet I could not rest. The fear wanted its way with me; it would not let me curl up and get warm and escape it. It wanted me to face it so it literally pushed me to keep going. The purging became more intense, but instead of making it back to the toilet I was hurling over the rail of the verandah. By this stage it was just bile and I coughed up something that looked like a foetus. Oh, you’re dead I thought. Interesting. You’re as dead as it gets.

I got back onto the mattress by the fire, I found myself in fetal position acting like a baby, almost sucking my thumb. I started laughing at myself and thought how ridiculous that was. It was hysterical! At some point I wondered if I even had a body. Again, I got myself up and went back around in circles a few times more… a few more rounds of “processing” before I really started to get it.

I experienced “death” a number of times. We’d been told that if we felt like we were going to die, then to go for it. That our body would not die, but something within us that needed to, would. I found myself willing myself to die cos I didn’t wanna experience the YUCK anymore. I was literally like, “OK! Let me die already!!” I was laughing when I was literally waiting for death and some big light to appear, cos I realised that was as dead as it gets. When I realised that I’d let something die, that I’d experienced a death, I thought “Oh, I better get back up again, and do something else! What do I want now?” I remember reading some channeled material about a decade ago, whereby they were musing over the fact that there were “dead” people lined up in rows, like in a cemetery, pretending to be dead. Because we believe in death, we lie there, thinkin’, ‘Ok, I must be dead.’ What a hoot! Oh and it just so happens this time around, that when I’m lyin’ there, thinkin’ I’m dead, I’ve still got a body. Woohooo! What a bonus!

Each time that things got better, they would inadvertently get worse again, ie, the more insights/Conscious Awareness I had, the worse the darkness got. I was swinging between the light and the dark until they both came to extremes. The extreme darkness came first. Hey, isn’t that so cliché … the darkness before the light? I was giving up, I was a lost soul. Hunched over, freezing cold, strung out over the railing, yet nothing to hold onto. I was and had nothing, or so I thought. It was like I had been banished from the tribe, yet, it was all self inflicted, all what I believed about myself.

It occurred to me that I had been doing this pattern for a very long time, lifetimes. I snapped into Awareness of this and thought, “What the fuck am I doing? Is this who I am? Is this what I want? Get up, get out of here.” Movement again. Shit, more vomiting. I needed to blow my nose. I had no tissues, damn, I did tell myself to remember the tissues last time. I blew my nose and had snot everywhere. I looked at the disgrace I was. I thought – you’re a woman, projectile vomiting over the balcony with snot running down your face. I Observed myself without the emotion. With no emotion attached to that it was simply: ‘So what? Who cares.’ There was no meaning to it. This gave me some comfort. And it was even a little bit funny. I walked back inside to find the tissues that I’d dutifully packed. Cos I’m a mum, you know. I’m organized and I do things properly. Bah! The labels we give ourselves. How hilarious.  

A few more rounds of wandering and processing again, each time coming back to the same places in the spiral and thinking “Oh… this is familiar… don’t wanna experience THAT again… but that “THAT” kept persisting until I would look it square in the face. And somehow that went hand in hand with the ability to desire and choose a different outcome.

Back to the toilet again. What if this is all there is? No, no, NO!!! IT CAN’T BE!!! THERE HAS TO BE MORE THAN THIS!!!

That was the breaking point. How could there NOT be more than this?? The first glimpses of light came in the toilet. I had now REALLY had enough with my relationship with the toilet! A revelation!!

I GET TO DECIDE NOW. It’s ALL ME. ITS UP TO ME. MY LIFE IS UP TO ME. Shit!!! The beginning of the “light” was born the moment I had the Thought. HmmMmm… something familiar about this statement? “In the beginning was the Word……”

And perhaps… all that darkness… was simply “compost” … the fertilizer that Birthed the Thought into Being .. that I wanted, that I was… more.

I finally got myself inside and on a mattress. Someone put a blanket over me. There was a glimmer of hope that the worst was over. I started to feel warm and nurturing of myself. I took comfort in the Knowing, the Truth, that now, TRULY, my life was up to ME!! IT’S ALL UP TO ME!! I was smiling, beaming…. This gave me great comfort, peace and JOY! OMG!! I CAN CREATE IT EXACTLY HOW I WANT IT NOW! I’M FREE!!!!

I AM FREE!!!!!

I kept swinging between light and dark for a while more, but the dark was now just an Awareness, a memory. I started seeing myself in scenarios, in my current life, going down the path of darkness; ie an old pattern, yet realizing, becoming Aware, Feeling and Thinking where I was going the “wrong way” and decidedly taking the other direction, a direction whereby I was Centred in my own Being and all Actions and Choices from that place could only be “right” … or to take the emotion out of that religious crap of there even being a “right and wrong” … could only feel “yum.” And even when its not really feeling too “yum”, but its “Right Action”, it at least feels like some sort of relief.

Going from darkness to light was synchronised with the music that was being played. Each time the darkness faded it just so happened that the man who was playing his guitar and singing in his beautiful voice had started a new song. The music and lyrics brought me back each time. There were many songs, and all of the words were so relevant, yet afterward, the only ones I could remember were:

‘Let the Truth

Nourish the Roots.’

I became more and more in Love. The Positive Opposite to the darkness I felt was pure Bliss. I was the sun, the warmth radiated from me.  Light and warmth burst out of my hands, heart and entire body. I loved everyone and everything. I loved those that had hurt me the most, that had really made me suffer, for showing me the Way, for playing the role to wake me up SO profoundly. For giving me what I had always wanted most but never knew… Strength and Courage to be me… Walking my own Path. I loved my whole life. I loved the darkness for what it had taught/brought me. Before I was asleep, I was in fear, and now… I was Awake. Nothing had changed but my perception, and the Awareness that I now had that I really was in charge of my own life. Which, paradoxically meant EVERYTHING had changed.  

Marianne; my friend, teacher, and Sharman, and her daughter came in and started cheering for me each time I was getting it (of course, they weren’t physically there, but I could “see” and “communicate” with them). It was so delicious to welcome the support. I’d go into darkness again, but when I started to Think myself out of, I became more and more Aware of when the balance tipped, and cautioned myself to not get attached, not even to the light. I discerned the Feeling of Balance, of the Middle Way. Just Allow. They came back, cheering me on again.

After a while Marianne said to her daughter in a playful tone … “Do ya think we should go so she gets the hint not to get too used to us cheering her on?” I laughed. Bliss was bubbling up from within me and pouring forth. I sang, I hummed, I sent love to those I knew and wanted to tell everyone in the room how awesome they were. I caught myself wanting to go and share this with everyone, and came back to the Awareness of Balance – Self First.  Sacred Selfishness. There’s NOTHING I need to do for anyone, other than be me. Its so funny… the first “spiritual healer” I ever went to, over a decade ago, told me the very same thing the first session I ever had. I was so desperate to “have a purpose,” to help others, to Serve, to give. She told me, “You’ll help others by simply being who you are.” It is really that simple. But I had to go on a Journey, to learn it… or rather… unlearn all the masses and layers of conditioning that told me otherwise.  

I was Aware of the man lying next to me, and thought that he was reaching out to comfort me and I contemplated letting him in, perhaps he wanted to hold my hand to comfort me. I opened my eyes to look at him yet he was nowhere near me. I laughed… my projection. With that came another decision, from new Awareness; I decided to simply be ME.  The messages kept coming back to that …. Nothing outside, only within. Keep bringing it back to within. I knew then, in that moment, in that instant, that I did not need anything from anyone. There was no other way. It was out of Integrity, and the Integrity of simply Being me was Bliss. Of course, “sharing” that with another from this space would just be awesome …

I no longer cared what anyone thought of me. I knew who I was, I knew my Path, and I Trusted in it. I was going to raise my daughter the way I Knew was best. I saw us living exactly as I wanted. I felt into scenarios with her where I did not know what to do, or have the answers. And realised that was ok, all of it, all of me, was good enough.  I could find my Way. I did not have to know all the answers. They come in their own way in their own right time. I was perfect as I was.

I knew I could Trust in my Path. I became more Aware that all roads lead to Self. Yet one of those paths is a bit harder, and hurts more. Yet it is ok. The worst that can happen is death. And there is no death.

I saw myself Walking my Walk with a big cat beside me… a female lion. I just felt its Presence.

My daughter came in a few times around this point too… she was just so happy! So happy her mum was getting it. I celebrated with her.

I was so Aware during all of it. I knew all that Marianne had taught me was true; we only needed the simple tools and not all of this “induced” experience to feel and know who we REALLY are. Yet it was an experience and I Consciously chose it. Even though a friend rang later in the day and gave me a serve of her judgment about me using “something external” which was a “drug” yet decidedly told me she was “not judging me” -  I did not care. When I felt my annoyance and anger at her rise in the moment, I released it knowing it was her stuff. I no longer needed to take on anyone else’s stuff.  I realised her projection that I ‘could have had an entity attached’ because I did Ayahuasca was her projection. It was wonderful to feel I KNEW otherwise; I did not have to take on her fear. She is a the-rapist after all. She’s supposed to find stuff attached to people and make a living from it … no problems with that, except, its just BS (a Belief System) that doesn’t work for me anymore. I don’t need to apologise to anyone for passing through that veil in order to make them a little more comfortable. Spent nuff lifetimes doin’ THAT. YUCK.

Yet, there was another Gift in her ‘judgment’  too: she did reflect the fact that I NEVER would have considered to do something like this before. Because she knew that I ALREADY know that we have DIRECT access to Consciousness 24/7. And I’ve been practicing this for a while. Yet, I’d been struggling to fully believe in it… to fully believe in myself, and have the Courage to take the Right Actions. So when this opportunity came along, it was Right Action. There was no question.. it felt “yum,” rather than “yuck” and so … it was simply something I had to do. And that’s the beauty about relying only on ourselves … on our own thoughts/Thoughts, and feelings/Feelings, and consciousness/Consciousness. Because all roads lead to Self.

I may not have learned much that I did not already know, yet it was truly a Gift.  Perhaps I knew these things before, but knowing and Knowing, and knowing and doing/Doing are different. Perhaps I know them at a level deep enough now to live it. Oh what am I talking about… I AM living it! As best I can, in the moment. It aligned me even further to my Path. Perhaps it just took away some doubt, when I had been doubting myself. If anything, it gave me more confidence in not only myself, and that I WAS Progressing, it gave me more confidence in the tools I have to use. Bonus! I felt so much love and appreciation for Marianne, for simply who she was and what she had given me by simply being herself, and sharing the tools she had. I wished I could return the Gift.

During the time I was purging so badly and wanted it all to end, but it wouldn’t, I swore I would never do it again. And even though I felt such love, bliss and warmth at the end, and the experience gave me so much, and I felt like I would really love to do it all again - I won’t ever do it again. Because as the integration kept happening throughout the rest of the day, it became even clearer that I ALREADY have within me ALL I ever need to know. It was a condensed, intense experience of what I already do: Observe myself as the Observer and the observed. Now I can Trust my self and Self … ALWAYS. And when I don’t … I can remember to remember.

I became Aware that there is a fine line in walking the Middle Way. It is ok to deviate off… too much toward a “good thing” can take us off balance … for example, pride and wanting others to see us or acknowledge us, as does too much darkness. Somewhere in that Middle Way feels like Power. And the Power is always in the Present Moment… not in the past… and certainly not when we’re digging around looking for it. YES … understanding helps… but life is ALWAYS showing us what we need in Present Time… we need go no further than our own thoughts and feelings.

The bliss subsided into comfort and rest. The darkness disappeared, but I had a newfound respect for it. I drifted off into sleep, until the Server sang us awake to sit in circle and Share.

There was so much to receive from all the others Sharing, and I gained so much from Sharing my own story. I was in fits and giggles of laughter at how hilarious the darkness was!! This “High Tone” state; ie  I was high UP on the Emotional Tone Scale, was testimony to my Progress and transformation. Oh my… it was so ironic… that the darkness/our shadows, is just SO friggin funny! I don’t usually feel so emotional in front of people when I’m sharing … I’m usually more aware of how I am trying to portray myself. This was real, this was me. I told them how I was the victim, crazy, helpless woman and how I faced and accepted the darkness and was warmed by the light. I wanted to say “WE ARE self and SELF!” but it didn’t come. Oh well, it wasn’t my job to tell anyone anything.

The Server told us, “Please don’t forget, please don’t forget.” I made the decision then and there to write this story… for myself.

I feel a new-found sense of acceptance for where everyone else is. How can I not love it? Because I love myself. Which also means I no longer need to make myself smaller to make anyone else feel comfortable in their stuckedness (technical term ;)). That was a big pattern that unravelled itself in the wee hours of the morning… the need to do anything for anyone. I don’t need to help anyone. I can just joyfully and blissfully be me.  And I can still be me when I’m not joyful and blissful. And being in the space of an Observer, seeing myself in the hopeless state, will be an Image that remains with me… as a reminder. I only have to remember to remember. Lucky I don’t mind Thinkin’ … (that very thing that the new-age movement tells ya NOT to do … just sayin’ … I didn’t get seven planets in air signs for nuthin… that would have been a seriously MEAN joke by any “external” God…. Just sayin’ …)

I only had one drink. I could have had another, there was a part of me pushing to do it and I had to discern if that voice was good for me or not. I wanted to allow myself the time to relax and integrate, it had been hard on my body and I was tired… it was not an excuse… it was self care. (Yes, I could Trust my self to make up my own Mind! GOSH… how liberating! Well if I didn’t decide who and what I was and what I wanted, who would? Oh yeah… been down that road before… that one had me hangin’ over the toilet bowl, remember?) It was powerful medicine. I did feel however, there could be so much more. That I could go deeper into my bliss/beingness, and funnily enough, that scared me more! I was a bit dubious about whether I had to experience all the purging again to “get” there, but was aware that the Power and wondrousness of what I could potentially experience might just be too much to handle! Ironic. Yet I also know that it would mean more to me to access that state on my own. Because I can, at the right time, in the right way and for the right reasons – not for need, fear or attachment.

Throughout the whole Journey, I was Aware that it was ME Creating it. All of it. It was my story, it was my game. I could Think myself through ANYTHING. I just had to decide what I wanted. Every time I decided, yet faced an obstacle, I wanted to give up. But the powerful medicine made me face it. I couldn’t give up, I simply had to keep going. And I know that powerful medicine IS me. The “Mother” that they say is Ayahuasca, IS ME. It is the tough voice that says “Get up, and keep going,” it is the gentle voice that says “It’s ok, rest now” … all the voices/Voices are me … my self and Self. I was Aware, I was Thinking the whole time. I’d long ago passed the veil in the “new-age” movement which tells you not to think, to get out of your head. Bullshit!! ALL of our thoughts are relevant! I welcomed them ALL… EACH had something to teach me… the supposedly “negative” ones showed me where I was not loving or allowing myself, signaling “wrong way,” and the “yum” feeling ones showed me the “right way”…. The way out that I was looking for? YES. It, life, spirituality, growth, evolution … does not need to be ANY more complicated than that! For chrissake, we have to THINK to interpret our feelings!! By doing so, I was able to do the “Right Actions” EVEN whilst under the influence. I felt there was a WAY between surrender/Allowing and Consciously Creating. And to participate, I simply Observed, and asked “How/What questions” … ie “What next?” “How do I get out of this?” to which I would receive an answer, ie “drink water, go to fire, walk over there.. etc,” which was me PARTICIPATING in my own experience.

This Awareness of self and Self is the “two streams of Consciousness.” Our ability to Observe the two streams makes US the “Holy Triad.” The truth has been in our face all along. YET – when we are “externalising,” as many do… such as saying “this is the ‘Mother’,” this is ‘Mother Earth’ … we lose Power. We abdicate our Power, and our Responsibility. And it is this one simple truth that has been kept secret from us (or not). We are IT.  When I was able to Observe myself spiraling down, I consciously Chose to change my Thinking AND observed my results, to know whether I was on track. This was my “Progress” through the ENTIRE time… and defines a VERY big difference between what most people generally do… which is PROCESS. The new-age movement has us all “processing” our emotions; goin over n over and over them to “heal” and “purge” them. This is not necessary. We do not need “healing.” The healing is simply in our Awareness, and our ability to Observe, and CHOOSE otherwise. And do the Actions that correspond with that. So when I was Choosing, using my Thinking, and even “willpower” … (eg a decided thought to CHANGE this pattern), I found myself up against obstacles. These I had to face, I had to surrender to…. The opposite of denial and avoidance. I needed to look directly into the face of my fears, my shadows. There was no avoiding this on Ayahuasca… and now I know, that there is no need to avoid them in the rest of my life either. They bring Gifts. Many. And when we don’t face our fears, they simply MUST materialise in our Reality. They get louder. When we simply Allow them to be what they are, just owning them, releasing them, and Choosing otherwise, they disappear. And oh how we can LAUGH! When we spiral/cycle around to a similar situation again, we remember to remember that we’ve been there before, and Choose a different way. And all that vomiting was simply the fear of meeting my fears… a rejection of them. A literal violent rejection of what I did not wish to own or see.  Those that are still externalising might vomit it out… yet they are still shutting out a part of their OWN mind. Fear is fear…. Allowing it is MUCH better than resisting it.

Ayahuasca showed me, with stark clarity, the two veils that are being held firmly in place to keep people asleep. The idea that we must “PROCESS” our way out of old stuff in order to “heal”, and that we keep “EXTERNALISING;” keeping us distracted from the Truth of who we REALLY are. The “new religion” is Gaia/Mother Earth/The Goddess. It is a trap. Ayahuasca does not want to be a religion either. It is a plant. WE CREATED IT with our Consciousness. It is a part of US. I do Respect; of the earth, of the plant, of all things. But I do not need an external God, or Goddess, or plant to worship… because I know these are simply a Reflection of me.

I bid everyone farewell and thanked the Server. She told me she could feel something about my beauty within that was very familiar to her. I smiled and left happy with who I am.

‘Let the Truth

Nourish the Roots.’

♥ `*.¸.*.♥.✿*.¸.*.♥☼ ❥ ... ℒƠѵℯ  Shriya 

A Dragon's Tale;  BLOG: http://adragonstale.weebly.com/

All the tools I use are shared freely over at www.creativegoalsetting.com

Marianne – Sharman, teacher, friend, SiStar… almost no words… infinity of Appreciation and thanks for EVERYTHING.

Israe – for ‘passing the torch’ and making profound guest-appearances of Support along the way. Thank you.

Gandalf – for being there at a pivotal moment that changed my life, for the experience and the abundant Gifts that it brought. Thank you.

N&T – for Providing the space, the vehicle, the music, and you.

There’s quite a lot of talk about Conscious Parenting these days, and it’s a sign of Evolving Times that people even want to become more Aware and Conscious about parenting. I’m sure there are as many views on what Conscious Parenting is as there are books on the subject. As with any “advice,” we can only ever try on what fits for size, and in my experience, that usually means a whole lot of alterations…. Hemming, mending, patching and sometimes complete re-modeling! Sometimes it's “whatever works!”

I’m just gonna share an experience to say what I’ve got to share. 

It was bedtime in our household and I detected a “ploy.” Many parents can relate to kids “trying it on” at bedtime in order to resist going to bed. I’m not going to discuss whether having a bedtime is “right” or “wrong” … I’m not really interested in that. In our household, at the moment, a bedtime is necessary for my daughter to have the wellbeing and care she needs for the life we are currently living. And that may change, only the Flow will know.

But back to the “ploy.” Dear Daughter and I were snuggling and saying goodnight, and there it emerges:

“Mum, my intuition’s telling me something… something a bit bad.”

I’m Aware that I usually respond with an inner EEEEK! Cos of course I don’t want my daughter to feel bad. I’d usually worry. This time, however, I catch myself in my Awareness. From experience, I know it’s probably a bedtime ploy, but of course, I will listen and determine if there is something really important she has to share with me. This is more important to me at this point, from my "Personal Values" point of view. If its something that we need to address, I can remind her later that she had plenty of time to chat to me BEFORE bedtime and remind myself to remind her well before bed the next night to share anything that’s on her mind.

“So what is it darling?”

“I don’t wanna tell you.”

(She often says that. My intuition tells me it’s a ploy).

“Oh,” I say. “That’s OK, you don’t have to. Your choice.”

A few moments of silence, and I’m tuning in, to myself, about What to say (How/What questions asked to Self get answers). This is me practicing Personal Responsibility; my Self always has the answers for me, so I can Trust that. It is the place to start, and then I can also tune into feeling her, which is using my empathy to feel behind her words.

I receive my answer … My tone is a little bit playful, cajoling: “I’m just wondering, you know, just in case, that MAYBE this is a little ‘ploy’ to get mummy to stay a little bit longer.”

She smiles.

I go on; “I mean, were ya just kinda layin’ there, figuring out “Hmmmm… what can I do to get mum’s attention? Oh! That’s how I get mum’s attention… I’ll say “intuition,” cos I know that is really important and so it must be real, so it will make her worry about me, and then she’ll think she's gotta help me fix it, and then she’ll stay with me.”

She giggles. 

Too much of a stretch, do you think? Well, I gave up “therapists” a few years ago and started Observing and Thinking for myself. "Know Thyself," as the saying goes. The good, the bad and the ugly. Ok that just sounded like a good thing to say… there is no good or bad... ugly could be a useful description tho ;)

I Share it with her. “Yeah, that’s what mummy does. I let other people 'harvest' my energy." 

At this point, I am becoming Aware, in Present Time, of an Opportunity for my own Healing, and I am Owning it; taking Personal Responsibility. (Hmmm ... What would be the usual response to a child do you think? I am exercising my Knowing that she is an Intelligent Being).

She laughs … “Harvesting energy?!” We use this term, for calling "a spade a spade"… watching Neighbours is good practice for that! (More on tellin’ it like it is in a minute). 

I make a big joke out of it now, “Yeah! That’s what I do! And that’s the way I’ve taught people how to treat me… how’s THAT?!” She’s laughing even more.

“Hmmm lucky I have Awareness, and I know that now. And I can change it. I can let people know how I like to be treated. So now we know that was an “energy harvesting” tactic, what do you think you might do instead next time?”

“I could ask you to lie down with me some more.”

“You could!”

“Mum, could you lie down with me for a bit?”

“I could!”

Problem solved. Now… if this was getting beyond my personal boundaries… where I literally felt she was demanding TOO much of my attention (such as we’d already had a lot of time together) I’d have to look deeper into the issue. I don’t believe that children require an endless quantity of our attention; of course, it is DEFINITELY important, yet, JUST as important is our Presence with them; Quality is what Presence actually is. Which really, is our Presence with ourselves. When we are being who we REALLY are, children feel safe. They do not feel the need to manipulate to get the attention they need. What are they really asking for? They’re really asking for a role model, in my opinion. They want to see YOU being YOU… demonstrating “Conscious Human Living.” Which means being REAL, being angry when you’re angry, being happy when you’re happy, and most of all, by taking Personal Responsibility for ALL of it, which includes taking Responsibility for showing them “wrong way” when they are manipulating you and “right way” by giving them the tools on how to go about it! 

Personal Responsibility does not mean blame. It just means Awareness, with a Decision to Action... to change our behaviour and do something that Serves us better. Growth. 

Now, I realize I may have lost many a Conscious Parent with my use of a taboo word: “manipulation”. My job is to bring light to this darkness. Much I have come across says  “children don’t manipulate” and I would suggest this is untrue. Children will manipulate when they are not getting their needs met. This is the “calling a spade a spade” part that I feel needs addressing. What I’m interested in is a WHOLE perspective, by Allowing manipulation to BE what it is. Manipulation. "Attention-seeking" is another term. Without it being “wrong.” If we accept it is a valid, then our acceptance of it transforms our resistance of it. Simple. A child has a need for attention as their needs are not being met. All behaviours are learned, and there are many reasons that a child may have learned to use this method to get what they need. One parent could be doing it to the other, or it could simply be their world-view based on what they see happening in the world. In all instances our Awareness of it IS the Opportunity to Transform it. 'Round 'ere we label things by how they make us feel: “yum” or “yuck” rather than “good” or “bad” or “right” or “wrong.” This is placing the importance back on what is important: Our Feelings. Because I absolutely Know; our Feelings are our Guide. 

We need to stop pretending that all children are little angels and face reality: we all have light and dark within. We need to be the Guide-posts for them, serving them by pointing out ALL behaviours, and rather than making them “bad” or “wrong,” demonstrating and explaining why they do or don’t work, for us. For example, I can let my daughter know, that when she is using such tactics on me, it hurts my feelings. That I don’t feel it is respectful of my time and energy. And that I’d prefer she do .... [insert request] .... instead. Now, this discussion is only one part of a very important aspect in teaching; the real teaching is of me LIVING this Way myself.

If I am not honouring my Self, and accepting ALL the things that I am and do, I am teaching her that I believe I am “wrong” and she will also be focused on “right” and “wrong” (she gets enough at that in school; this part, our relationship, is her “unschooling”).

When I accept myself completely, knowing that there are NO mistakes, that every thing I am doing is based on the best I know at the time based on my own personal and unique experience, then I give that Gift to her too. And when I do this for myself, I automatically do it for others. Knowing I am ALWAYS doing the best I can with what I know and the resources I have, I know that others are too. By seeing my "shadow" and knowing when I might be either compromising myself by giving away too much of my self to others, or by knowing how I seek attention from others to fulfill a missing need in ME brings light to my darkness. I can heal and Transform. But first I have to have eyes to see; not pretending its not there, not pretending things don't hurt, and by being REAL about it.  By giving myself this Care, this Self Love, I also have natural boundaries with others and know that is a Value that will be demonstrated to her also. And I’ve decided I can Trust that Truth, and in fact, it's all I’ve come to count upon.

And in case you missed it… this little “ploy” was her unconscious way (or maybe she secretly planned it ;) ) of instigating my own Healing. Because she brought to my Awareness, in the Present Moment, at the right time, the EXACT thing I needed to be Aware of… even if it was “manipulation” or by "atttention-seeking." Thank goodness for manipulation! Thank goodness for those that hurt/harm us! How else would we wake up?! And so, there was my opportunity, right then and there, to release it! Because I’ve recently decided I no longer want or need to be a “people pleaser.” It just doesn’t fit any more. Wrong size. I just wanna be ME. And I think thats a pretty good example for my daughter too. 

Bless the "little" Teachers!

☼ ❥ ... ℒƠѵℯ  Shriya 

A Dragon's Tale;  BLOG: http://adragonstale.weebly.com/
Image: "Mother and baby dragon" by Sarah L Crockett

`*.¸.*.♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ ☼•*`*.¸.* Shoo shoo Sunshine… 
....don’t shine on me….  

...Were the lyrics my five year old daughter came home singing from school today. HmmMmmm… interesting. 

WTF?!? 

If you’re not already angry about this… then you should probably read on…

Telling five year olds to “shoo” the sun and “don’t shine on me”? Now what could be the reason for that? And what could be SO important about this message that it is put into song and formed as part of the kindergarten level school program? Because songs are literally how our thinking is programmed … you do know that don’t you?

Well, this “shoo the sun” message is not really new is it. There’s the very clear message now on how the “evil sun” is giving us all skin cancer and killing us off. And schools have “no hat, no play” policy, not to mention the “governed” anti-sun cancer messages and plethora of “anti-cancer” sunscreens full of chemicals. Hmmmm.  

If you’re reading this, you’re probably already Aware that the sun is good for us, that there are a gazillion EASY ways to heal cancer, that the REAL issue is in fact a bunch of other issues within some gooey collective goop ...  including the toxic chemtrails being sprayed worldwide; chemicals here, there and everywhere, the mass marketing ploy promoting fear and effectively implanting the belief of cancer within the psyche of all the sheeple… (Oh you thought Angelina cut off her breasts just for fun! Well of course that was not to scare women into getting mammograms… cos they don’t cause cancer and make a LOT of money at the same time or anything, and it wouldn’t be because she is a role model encouraging women to “cut of their breasts” … “just to be safe,” now… would it?)

And if you’re not “seeing” this, then I’d politely say to “wake up”. But I'm really only writing this for myself... standing here, seeing what is REALLY going on… what do I do when the conditioning, the messages, the programming is just SO strong? I know I could just not send my daughter to school and educate her myself and in other ways, and believe me, if that were an option in my life right now I would seriously consider it. Yet, trusting ALL is for a Higher Purpose, she’s there right now, and I am not sugar-coating the fact that she’s within the business which makes humans into “Human Resources.” Yes of course… the education system is a business. An effective system for chugging through humans that become “resources” for the “labour market." And those that don’t fit it, we’ll they’re just the misfits of society, or mentally ill, is all. Awareness heals. What was that saying... "Better the devil you know than the one you don't"? Well no-one's sayin' ya gotta keep the devil ya know if ya really just think its stoopid. 

Yet, with all this Awareness, even knowing the silliness and absurdity of all this non-sense, I’m about now feeling overwhelmed with the task and responsibility that seems to come with having such Awareness these days. Because the more I wake up myself and see what has always been there, but I now no longer want in my Reality, the bigger the responsibility it is for me to release what I no longer do want and decide what I do. And where to start but the beginning, releasing my feelings of overwhelm with a round of EFT:

“Even tho the task of being Aware feels like an overwhelming responsibility, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”

Now that part's fixed, what CAN we do? When all else around us seems to be such a powerful, money driven, war-producing, sickness inducing bunch of goop? We can opt out. We can release our emotional attachments and start deciding for ourselves, being Conscious Creators. With my daughter, we USE our Awareness. We actually chat about things. I ask her questions… “Why do you think they’re teaching you to shoo the sun away?” And we do the EFTs. I am equipping her to use her Mind, her Thinking, her Awareness to take Personal Responsibility for what is in her reality.  Interestingly, that is NOT taught in schools.

Of course, I cannot make her do it. But the one thing I am responsible for is me, and the best way I can parent right now is to pass on the tools for her to be able to Think for herself. Something that has been sadly lost and is becoming quite extinct in many cases. And as we do this, we will find ourselves in a situation whereby living in the way we REALLY want IS reflected in our reality. We’ll connect with others who have this ability too, at the right time, for the right reasons and in the right way. We’ve just gotta decide it for ourselves. Stuck in the goop? Or EFT, release, make another Choice. Decision is ours.

By the way.. NEWSFLASH! the sun is good for us. It is the sun that is actively helping us to Evolve our Consciousness. And it doesn’t really take that much to be able to “manage” our own relationship with the sun, other than a little common sense. Be aware of your skin type. Stay out of direct sun when its too hot. Feel your skin getting tingly and use your intuition when you’ve had enough. That kinda thing. Good ole’ common sense.

☼ ❥ ... ℒƠѵℯ  Shriya 

Sitting here, wondering what I am going to write about. I made a half-hearted commitment to myself to blog every day, but I’m in the middle of a huge crisis in my life right now and I’m feeling anything but positive and inspired to write. Oh hang on… did I just say something about making a “half-hearted commitment”? Shit, I just got a chill all over and goosebumps (truthbumps) up my legs. I already know what that means, and I’m already scared to see where this is gonna go…..I better do a round of EFT:

“Even tho I’ve just stumbled on a Personal Truth that I’ve only been half-heartedly committing to something, and I’m scared as hell to see what fully committing will mean, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.” (I reckon this is a pretty universal one, so feel free in joining me for a round of EFT if you think that could be the case for you right now… http://creativegoalsetting.com/eft/)

Tap, tap, tap.

Yes, I tapped that out before writing any more. I yawned all the way through it too, a signal that I am resisting moving beyond this. Must be a big one. I’ll do another eft (still yawning)...

 “Even tho I’m resisting facing this big something, because this big something is a REALLY big scary something, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”

Tap, tap, tap. Still yawning. Perhaps I better remind myself of the blog I wrote myself a couple of days ago … what was it? Tiredness is ONLY EVER RESISTANCE! And what are we resisting? We are only EVER resisting the newer and greater version of our Self! (http://adragonstale.weebly.com/1/post/2013/06/tiredness-what-are-we-resisting.html)

Ok, well here’s the problem. Walking that Talk is a lot harder than it is to say it. I’m human. I am struggling to Walk that Talk and juggling to manage all manner of things in my life to do that. Woops, there I go chattin’ to myself again, giving the clues away. I just said “juggling.” What am I juggling? Why on earth do I feel I need to juggle ANYTHING?

Funny thing about asking yourself questions… you get answers.

I’m trying to manage….  others. See, my current life situation is made all the more difficult because others’ wellbeing is at stake. Or at least, that is what my current perception tells me. So it really puts things into black and white perspective now: I can either decide what is right for me, or put others before me. Compromise is the first word that jumps to mind, and so I’ll run with it. What if I’ve already “over-compromised”? What if I’m at my limit of compromised, I’m all used up, the compromise tank is empty? What if my compromise was so far at my own cost that others just want more and more and more and more and more from me and never let up that my compromise evolves to "shriveled up prune"?

 Well, I can choose. Keep compromising. Shriveled up prune. Or not. Simple.

If only it were!

Now that I’ve gotten as clear as mud there, exhausting all my “logical” options, I’m scarily being whooshed into that great big Void of “I don’t know.” Scary place – have you ever been there? Brrr… its cold in here. Cold = fear. I can go back… sure… THAT worked well… NOT. Or I can go forward. Into the unknown. And the only thing I’ve got to go by, is a flimsy idea that comes with no guarantee, no extended warranty option, not even a promise of a “happy ending.”

What if there are no happy endings?

What if the happy ending is the end of THIS … the end of the drama, the end of the confusion, the end of the doubt, the end of the fear?

What if there was only new beginnings? And to actually get ‘em, you had to let go, just let go of what you think it might look like or might be, and go with whatever it is that you have to hang on to? In some cases it is simply “It can’t get any worse than this.”

In all cases, this flimsy idea is called “Radical Trust.” Knowing that however far we've come, whatever has Guided us IS, ALL-WAYS for the Highest Good of All Concerned.

Maybe its not so flimsy after all. Just gotta take a Leap of Faith to get it. I mean, I guess today's blog happened after all, even though it started with a half-hearted commitment. 

Fingers to the keyboard... feet on the pavement ... pedal to the metal ... sumthin like that ;)

 ♥ `*.¸.*.♥.✿*.¸.*.♥☼ ❥ ... ℒƠѵℯ  Shriya 

A Dragon's Tale;  BLOG: http://adragonstale.weebly.com/

Image: Dragon Mountain by ~cepnox cepnox.deviantart.com

There is day, and there is night. If we weren’t meant to have the night, well, we just wouldn’t. So what’s with this fluffy, clichéd new-age concept that its all about love and light? Don’t get me wrong, love and light sure is yummy, yet, I’m talking bout all the focus on avoiding the darkness which is akin to painting over rust and pretending its not there.

Imo, this over-emphasis on “love n light” or “being in one’s heart” is being proffered by those with motives to keep us unaware of the simplest of truths – there is meant to be darkness, just as much as there is meant to be light. Balance. Yet, people en masse resist the darkness, the shadow; avoiding it like the plague. But if one wants more light, one must be able to face the darkness; for en-lighten-ment is to make the dark Conscious, as one wise man once said.

As it goes, the more light/Consciousness one becomes, the more darkness one is able to perceive and handle constructively. It cannot be any other way. Focussing on only the light, without first accepting and transforming/transmuting the darkness is denial and avoidance. And really, there’s nothing wrong with denial and avoidance, it serves its purpose… yet… probably only for a while. Then it just becomes “stuckedness,” (technical term of course), and this usually shows up in all manner of ways in one’s life via Universal Feedback, (but that’s another story).

In order to perceive the darkness however, one does not need to be overwhelmed by it, nor stay stuck in it. The darkness in its rightful place serves to birth Consciousness – seeds germinate in the darkness. That which is dark has a positive light/Conscious opposite. When we see things that we really don’t want, it gives us a very clear indication of what we DO want instead. The more dark we are able to perceive, and transmute, by first releasing our emotional responses to it (apathy, fear, denial, avoidance, anger for example) and then our emotional attachment to having it in our reality, and then, deciding what we REALLY want instead, the more opportunity for the Evolution of our Consciousness. If we want, of course.

It is why we are in this unique phase and time, with things seemingly getting so much worse – when looking at world events such as war, poverty, weather manipulation, environmental destruction, the economy and so forth; whilst also seemingly getting so much better – when looking at how  some people are becoming Aware of their Sovereignty and ability to Consciously Create their own Reality. Even our DNA is evolving.

It is only in accepting the duality that we can harmonise the aspects – become “whole” – this is the true meaning of “Holy.”  (Woops, the buggers changed the language again, I meant “Wholly.” ;) ) It is also the true meaning of Unity. Unity is not some fluffy concept of us “all being in it together and getting along.” It is the Uniting of the disparate parts within ourselves, which is then reflected; ie materialised, in our outer reality too. This yummy place somewhere in the inbetween the duality, harmonised, that would not be possible without them is also known as “The Middle Way”. The Tao. But fear not, we don’t need to be attached to staying there either. As a Wise Owl reminded me just the other day, All Roads lead to Self.

There is a mis-conception that we must do the thing that we fear most. No, we actually only need to FACE the thing that we fear most; we need to face the “worst case scenario” of what we FEAR might happen if we actually do the thing that we really WANT the most. When we release the fear of “what might happen” we can get on with doing it anyway. That is what is meant by “feel the fear and do it anyway.” The “anyway” part is what we REALLY want. Feel it, release it, and do/be it anyway.

It is then, as it has always been, our Choice;  using our Free Will, what we choose to focus on, and that which we focus upon, becomes our Reality. 

So, when there’s some darkness that is seemingly too much to bear, I use a quick round of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to clear my “stuff” on it, for example, “Even though this thing in my life is just so awful that I cannot bear to face it, I deeply and completely love and accept myself. I then write the Positive Opposite to it in the relevant section of my Creative Goal Setting Folder. Both of which tools are Shared freely here: www.creativegoalsetting.com

 ♥ `*.¸.*.♥.✿*.¸.*.♥☼ ❥ ... ℒƠѵℯ  Shriya 

Drama is a poor substitute for Creativity. Just sayin' ....

♥ `*.¸.*.♥.✿*.¸.*.♥☼ ❥ ... ℒƠѵℯ  Shriya 

We are only EVER resisting the newer and greater version of our Self!

I could leave the blog at that, and that could possibly sound quite wise and philosophical, but I’m not yet that wise so even tho I’ve said it, I even need an explanation of that. So here goes. Lately I’ve been observing a LOT of people feeling quite tired. There seems to be some global lethargy goin on, and there’s all manner of explanations for it… one of the most common in the new-age arena being dubbed “ascension symptoms.” I might get to more on that in a minute (I don’t even know where this is goin’ yet). Added to that, there’s more and more reports on the solar flares, the stars, the Mayan calendar, the comets, what moon phase we’re in…. Not to mention what the powers-that-be are up to… chemtrails, haarp, radiation, etc. The list goes on, and apparently, we’re affected by all of it. When things are good, they’re good, but when things are shite, well, we can just blame it on any one of those external powerful forces, can’t we? Well yeah, if we want to, or, we can make a Choice right now to take 100% Personal Responsibility for our ENTIRE REALITY. Can we? Yikes… yep… we’re steppin it up…

A wise owl told me long ago, and a few (hundred) times more since then, that “tiredness is just resistance.” Now, I like to think I have an open mind about most new concepts, at least, open enough to not resist them (ok, pun intended, I can’t help it, I’ve at least got to laugh at myself – what else do you do when you have seven planets as Air signs? Write blogs to yourself, clearly).

So is it true that every time I am tired, I am resisting something? Well, in a nutshell, yes. But even tho the truth is often plain and simple, my very human self sure does need to be able to experience it fully to be able to fathom it. So the last couple of weeks, increasingly, I’ve been fathoming. And here’s what I have to share.

We are only EVER resisting the newer and greater version of our Self!

Still not convinced? Well, I’ll attempt to give the short version.

We’ve (I’ve) forgotten that I am a Conscious Creator – I Create my own world, no exceptions. Whilst having my experience on this planet, I’ve collected all manner of data and information about what I don’t want and what I do want. The simple truth is, what I do want, is already lined up for me. I’ve Created it via my Thoughts, my Dreaming, my Imagining – simple Law of AttrACTION stuff which we’ve all known for a decade or two now (hint: Capitalisation of ACTION means we actually gotta take Action to meet what we’re Askin for). But if we know this, why are so many people experiencing pain, illness, tiredness and general lethargy, the so called “ascension symptoms”?

Well, speaking for myself, its when I am not keeping up with Me. When self is not keeping up with Self, or the gap between self and Self is too wide. My Self (read: Higher Self/Consciousness/God/Whatever-ya-call-it) has got my best interests handled. It is as good as done, it is MANIFEST, and now, I just gotta get myself lined up with it, in order to MATERIALISE IT. But, if I’m goin’ with the current current, the popular one whereby we compare symptoms and ailments just to prove we’re being affected by it, the one that has me pegged to be suffering from every solar flare, every sonic boom of haarp, even such seemingly physical maladies such as the effects of radiation, well, I’ve drifted away from MY current. And I have been blabbing about Creating My Own Reality for more than a decade now, so I wouldn’t be Walkin my Talk and Walkin my Walk if I didn’t think that “I” CREATED THEM, now would I?

Hang on, am I saying that I created the chemtrails, and I can even change my reality about them? Yes. I am. And when I’m looking at chemtrails, and I’m not evolving beyond them (as my Self already has me pegged to be) then something will get my attention to show me where I’m off my drift; my current, my Path. Like tiredness. Like any kind of physical malady. Like negative thoughts that I stay stuck in. Like believing the chemtrails can hurt me.

So a quick round of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique:  http://creativegoalsetting.com/eft/ ) fixes that: “Even tho I believe that external influences can affect my reality in a negative way, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”

Hey its worth an EFT don’t cha think? Nuthin much to lose if we bop a few ascension symptoms on the head!

Now what was I saying about Personal Responsibility? Now that I have released my emotional attachment to NEEDING to be affected by external influences, I can go within and really look at what is happening in present time. How am I feeling? Where am I at in my life? Now I personally have taken the time to consider what I REALLY want in my life.

If, at any time, I’m resisting what I’ve already created, then I can count on getting some feedback. And that is what tiredness is.  When we feel alive, happy and joyous.. we just Know when its time to rest our body and sleep. 

♥ `*.¸.*.♥.✿*.¸.*.♥☼ ❥ ... ℒƠѵℯ  Shriya